How the internet changed my life : a continuing saga.

I’m not that into chatting. Honestly. If you ask me for my IM ID# I’m going to have to ask my beloved Manboy/personal organizer and then I’ll get back to you with it. Skype is on my laptop but often disconnected since Abdul47 likes to send me messages like ‘poo’ and ‘pee pee poo poo’ which I find annoying in his feeble attempts to, well annoy me.

I mean, what kind of guy walks up to a girl in a bar and says ‘poo’ and thinks that she’s going to go home with him? Get a grip Abdul47. Social skills are not that hard, buddy. 

Ha ! I’m one to talk about social skills ! I’m the girl that would rather spend my days hanging out with the three friends that I have had since I was born than making new ones. There’s just so much work that goes into a new friend before they become and old friend and I don’t always have the energy to make it there. The screening process (I know it’s terrible to talk this way, but you do it as well, but just don’t talk about it) can be delicate as well.

Sometimes an odd one makes it through, like the office colleague who is so much fun at work so you decide to go out and she like turns into a psychotic ex-stripper manic-depressive who tries to hook you up with her staunch Rebublican roommate. She talks and talks and talks about herself and just won’t shut up in that tiny shirt with one shoulder-strap until her breast actually pops out of it, wait she’s slipping screaming, falls, shattering the glass coffee table; blood and pointy-toed high-heels everywhere.

Really happened. Not a good scene.

I changed schools quite a lot as a kid. Invariaby when I arrived at a new school, the ‘popular’-ish kids would approach me, in order to befriend and initiate me into their exclusive circle. That would last about two days, long enough for them to see I was an awkward freakpot that just looked fairly normal.

I quickly learned and by the time I started middle school purposely showed them I didn’t want to be friends when approached, which would speed up the process and was less painful than the inevitable forthcoming rejection.

Hence, the contentment being a social hag. I’d rather stay home and watch movies in my pajamas then go out dancing. I mean, ew, people are going to talk to me, and sweaty men are going to check me out. Besides, I can dance at home in my pajamas.

As for social networks, I’ve generally been as haggy as the real life non-virtual me. If you look on my MySpace page you’ll see my three friends that I’ve had since I was born. And I’m happy with that. MyBlogLog isn’t much better, and don’t even get me started on the miniscule number of Flickr contacts that I boast. I recently joined Francophilia,a network for, duh, francophiles and things are a bit better over there…

I know that keeping a low profile affects blog readership as well, and I’m not a snob, I’ll openly admit it – I want readers ! When I’m rich someday, I’ll pay you to read my blog and leave me nice comments ! “Oh Sassy, you’re so funny/pretty/amazing !” Bring it on ! You are my bain de soleil and I bask unashamedly !!! 

So I smoked crack (again) and joined NoBloPoMo. New horizons. Count ‘em baby, I’ve got ‘friends’ (we’re still taking the term lightly for the time being) in the double digits. The difference? Flagrant self-promotion. And you know wht, it works ! My readership hads already DOUBLED ! (Read : gone from one to two readers.)